NOPE: Giant Redback Spider Liquefies Snake, Drinks It


A couple got the shock of their lives when they stumbled across the aftermath of a deadly ‘David and Goliath’ style battle between a spider and a snake – and, unsurprisingly, ‘David’ won.
Paul and Bernadette Gibbs photographed the giant female redback spider who had manage to catch a deadly brown snake in her web in their garage, which it then liquefied with its venom and drank it, the Daily Mail reports.
The pair live in Morpeth in Hunter Valley, New South Wales and are used to encountering black and brown snakes, redback spiders and eastern water dragons around their home due to their home’s closeness to the Hunter River, but even they say they’d never seen anything like this.

Surprisingly, these spider versus snake battles are quite common, and only two weeks ago West Australian mother-of-three, Jamii-Leigh Marwick, posted footage on Facebook of a brown snake twisting in a redback’s web in a garage.
Craig Adams, a snake and spider safety expert, told Daily Mail Australia that redbacks are ‘very good web throwers, like Spider-Man’ to target and trap their prey’.

He explained that once the spider was able to overcome the snake, the spider would pierce the snake’s skin, which it would not eat, then liquefy the tissue using its venom and basically drink it, in one of the most NOPE-worthy ways to die we could imagine.
Mr Adams said spiders weren’t prey preference for snakes, but that snakes were able to be consumed by spiders.
Oh Australian wildlife, you so scary!

This Guy's Girlfriend Sent Him To Buy Her Make Up And He Didn't Have A Clue


If you've ever been made to go shopping for your girlfriend, then you'll know the pain that it causes.
It's not a simple thing for a lad to go into Boots and buy tampons, hair spray and nail polish. Girls seem to think that it's easy and that it won't take a lot of time, but they are wrong. Oh so wrong.
This guy found that out when his girlfriend sent him to get her something called matte, lipstick, eyelashes and all kinds.

Warner Bros Is Allegedly Re-Shooting 'Suicide Squad', Because It's Not Funny


Ever since Deadpool crushed it at the box office, and Batman v Supermantanked, the big wigs in Hollywood have realised something.
People want superhero movies that are full of laughs and juvenile innuendo, not lantern-jawed cape-wearers getting all pissed at each other.

As it is, various reports are emerging that say Warner Bros is re-shooting huge portions of Suicide Squad. Why? Because it's not funny, and Deadpool proved that funny sells.
According to Birth. Movies. Death, the studio is spending "tens of millions of dollars" to add more "lightness" to the film, in an effort to avoid the fate ofBatman v Superman. Right now, "Every joke in the movie is in that trailer."


If the reports are true, let's hope they don't mess it up. Every film that's ever been re-shot has been messed up.
Suicide Squad is set to be released in August.

Beer Made From Vag*na Is Now A Thing Because 2016



A few weeks ago it emerged that women are paying £147 to let strangers rub their vag*nas… Now it’s emerged that there’s a hot new product in the making. What you ask? Beer, created from the essence of a real vag*na.
Ah 2016, you never fail to amaze me. This new beer is made out of the vag*nal bacteria from Czech model, Alexandra Brendlova. Fancy.
As reported by the Mirror, the product, called Bottled Instinct, pretty much does exactly what it says on the tin.
Its makers create it by taking bacteria from the vag*na using a ‘gynaecological stick’. Then it’s sent to a lab where the lactic acid bacteria are ‘isolated and cleaned’ before being multiplied.

Bottled Instinct is produced by Vag*na themed group (yep you read that right), The Order of Yoni, who say that their aim is to capture the essence of ‘femininity’.
But they don’t stop there when describing their product, with their website stating:
Imagine woman of your dreams, your object of desire. Her charm, her sensuality, her passion… Try her taste, feel her smell, hear her voice… Imagine her massaging you passionately and whispering into your ear everything you want.
Now free your fantasies and imagine that with a magic wand you can close it in one bottle of beer. The golden drink brewed with her lure and grace and flavored with instincts.
Imagine the beer which every sip is a randez-vous with this hot woman of your dreams… she hugs you and kiss you gently, looking straight into your eyes… How much would you give for that beer?
I wouldn’t give anything for that beer, but so far the Indiegogo fundraiser to get the product on the market has raised over a hundred pounds…

But there are some perks (well, if vag*nal bacteria is your thing) to donating a few pounds.
If you donate 2 euros (£1.58) you’ll get your name on the websites hall of fame, woo you!!!
For 7 euros (£5.53) you’ll get a free postcard with the models picture on it.
But if you go all out, and donate 10,000 euros (£7896) then you’ll bag a voucher for 60 bottles of Bottled Instinct made from your own girlfriends vag*nal bacteria – oh and if that wasn’t enough, you also get 40 grams of her bacteria to make your own weird concoction of home brew.

Personally I don’t see the attraction in drinking beer made from vag*nal bacteria. Just like I don’t see the attraction in eating bread made from vag*nal yeast.
Call me old fashioned but it just isn’t my thing…

P*rnhub Transforms Into 'Cornhub' For April Fools' Day


As we're all fully aware, P*rnhub is an online heaven - a Shangri-la of the internet, if you will.
Not only do they deliver one of the most important things on the web straight to your browser, they also have impeccable banter.
For April Fools' Day, they transformed to 'Cornhub', a site offering zesty and s*xy videos of corn.





'Hot interracial shuck' is by far my favourite.
Sadly, clicking on a link won't take you to steaming hot videos of corn being dunked in gravy. The gag was only a skin.